Sparkle & Shine

I write this while sitting in a Laundromat. I come here every so often to wash my comforter since it’s too big to fit in my washer at home. The place is right down the street from my house, and every time I’m here I gain a greater respect for those who have to schlep piles of laundry here every week. Not to mention it reminds me to be very grateful for the rickety washer I have at home.

Tonight there is a family here with me. A young Hispanic couple with three kids ranging from what looks like between 3 months to around 12 years. The middle child is a boy who is most likely around 5. He’s chock full of energy, but not in that obnoxious wreaking-havoc-on-everything-around-him sort of way. Instead, he’s playing some sort of imaginary game, and although I don’t understand what he’s saying, I can only imagine that he’s conjuring up something grand. Whatever it is, it’s sweet to watch. He glances at me occasionally, and smiles back when I smile at him. He seems curious about me and like any kid, starts becoming a little more animated with whatever it is he’s pretending to be when he knows I’m watching. I send out a secret wish to him that he gets to pursue a path in life that gives him as much satisfaction as he’s getting right now.

That’s the thing about kids, there’s a time in life when the whole world is wide open for them. It’s before they start listening to a world that tells them that they can’t step outside the box that society has constructed for them. I remember my daughter telling me when she was very little that she wanted to be “the person who makes sidewalks”. I can’t recall exactly why she said that was so alluring to her at the time, but in retrospect it showed a desire to create and design something, which speaks of the artist she is today.

My point in all of this is that as adults it’s important to find that kernel of childhood spark – a belief that anything is possible – to uncover the bit still untarnished by society’s boxes. Without it we would be devoid of so many things. Can you imagine the flack that the Wright brothers got for even talking about their dream of building a “flying machine”? What if they had listened to the naysayers? They had to have a combination of confidence, vision and the childlike belief in possibility to pull that one off.

Whatever it is that makes you feel all sparkly, do it. If you feel that your spark has been snuffed out or is fading, then it’s time to start doing what you love again to rekindle it. Find something, no matter how small, to fan the flames. It doesn’t have to look like it did when you were a kid. I didn’t achieve my once-upon-a-childhood dream of becoming a secret spy, though I’ve been able to pursue work that requires observation, something I enjoy and I’m sure is a necessary skill for a productive secret spy. Do whatever it takes to start feeling inspired – take a walk, grab a sketchpad and doodle, read a book, sing a song, write a song – whatever feels good to you.

I believe in you, Sparky.

With Love.

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From Over There:

“Belief in one’s abilities circumvents the limitations perceived by others. The perception of limitation is the product of the mind, and represents the closing off of connection to the spirit’s wisdom.  The mind that remains open allows for creative flow and the spirit’s wisdom to be present. By remaining open one calls forth benevolent forces to support the unfolding of ability and the confidence needed to sustain belief in oneself. Belief in oneself is necessary regardless of the level of ability. Without it the ability becomes stagnant, never meeting full potential”

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Featured Guest: Venus Williams

This week’s guest is Venus Williams, professional tennis player (former world #1), entrepreneur, and role-model. Here's a quote from her that pretty much says it all: “Some people say I have attitude - maybe I do... but I think you have to. You have to believe in yourself when no one else does - that makes you a winner right there.” 

Laugh It Up

I want you to imagine a time when you were in the midst of uncontrollable laughter. We’ve all been there, something funny strikes and you just can’t seem to stop. Belly muscles start to ache a little, tears start to fall, but at that moment there’s not one thing that feels bad or wrong. And there’s nothing quite like it when it happens in a group, it’s infectious. One person starts to laugh and then before you know it everyone is joining in.  

On the flipside, have you ever been around someone who didn’t seem to have much of a sense of humor, or had a hard time seeing the light side of things? They feel heavy, don’t they? Not to mention a bit of a buzzkill, if I don’t mind saying. Now I know we all have times when we’re down, but what I’m talking about are those who just never seem to get the joke, and never seem to want to. It’s as if laughter and silliness is beneath them. I often wonder what it must be like to be in their skin, seems like it must feel pretty uncomfortable.

To horribly date myself, I remember reading my Grandmother’s issues of Reader’s Digest as a kid and would automatically go straight for the section I believe was called something like Laughter is the Best Medicine. Most of what was written was pretty cheesy, but what I loved were the stories that highlighted everyday life circumstances where a funny twist occurred. I liked how it showed how you can find humor in just about anything, and that doing so makes life a whole lot more fun. Let’s face it, life can be challenging. So why not make the best of it? I mean, no one is immune to painful experiences on this planet, so if laughter makes dealing with the inevitable easier then I say “Ha, Ha” and another big “Ha!”  

With Love.

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From Over There:

“Laughter is the soul’s way of reaching through the physical. Laughter, when done from a lighthearted perspective, is a high vibrational form of communication that has a profoundly positive effect on those who come in contact with its source. The sound of laughter reverberates at a frequency that raises the energetic fields all around. This is why it appears to be infectious. It is through this energetic shift that the true self is revealed. While is this state of joy there is no sorrow, no anger.

To view life from a lighthearted perspective allows one to find humor throughout day-to-day life. This way of being releases the heavy burden of emotional discomfort. One cannot be sad while one is in the state of laughter. This is not to use laughter as a form of avoidance of emotional discomfort, but to help one ease through the pain. It is to help one release the pain, and create the ability to remain less affected by the pain one experiences.

Much laughter equals much joy. Joy is the spirit’s expression of true self.”

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Featured Guest: Mark Twain

This week is a simple quote from master humorist, Mark Twain: “Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.”

Yet Another Cat Picture...

This week’s post is related to something that I think most everyone who is on Facebook or surfs the internet can relate to. It has to do with cats, or rather cat pictures or videos. All you have to do is google the word “cats” or do a search on Facebook to pull up an amazing array of kitties doing what they do best, looking cute.

Yes, I am a cat parent and have, at any given time, had one or two of the little critters around the house for most of my life. I find them to be such goofy characters and so fun to watch. Other people must feel the same, because I’ve noticed that whenever posting a picture on Facebook of one of my cats doing something silly it gets multiple “likes”. The flipside of this is when I’ve posted a link to an article I find meaningful, (or this blog, for instance) that seems to get hardly noticed. And although I do (thankfully) know that plenty of people are reading my posts, I started wondering why things like cat pics are guaranteed to be popular, when other posts aren’t. I’ve also noticed that I don’t seem to be the only one experiencing this phenomenon.  

My pondering all of this leads to this week’s message and how to reconnect to that non-judgmental part of ourselves. It’s about how hanging out with our furry friends (this of course includes dogs, rabbits, pigs…whatever your pet’s species happens to be), small children, or anyone that doesn’t have the capacity judge or criticize can bring us back to a place of acceptance. Think about it, can you remember a time when watching a pet’s silly antics, or playing with a laughing baby that you felt judgmental? Kind of impossible, isn’t it?

So yes, please, keep enjoying my cat pictures, and I’ll keep enjoying yours…

With Love.

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From Over There:

“Connecting with a source of innocence reawakens a conscious connection to the soul. This is a state of non-judgment, of wonder, and of simplicity. Spending time with activities that instill a sense of playful innocence – such as interacting with small children or domesticated animals – opens one to a more lighthearted perspective. This lightheartedness perpetuates joy, leading to a generally happier life. This happiness keeps the mind, the body and the soul interconnected for increased conscious awareness, and creates greater understanding of the effect each one has on the whole.”

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Featured Guest: ASPCA

Founded in 1866, the ASPCA was the first humane organization in the Western Hemisphere. Our mission, as stated by founder Henry Bergh, is “to provide effective means for the prevention of cruelty to animals throughout the United States.” While there are SPCAs and humane societies all over the country, the ASPCA is not directly affiliated with them. However, the ASPCA works nationally to rescue animals from abuse, pass humane laws and share resources with many shelters across the country. To learn more, please visit aspca.org.

Not So Blurry

There’s been a flurry of commentary around Robin Thicke’s music video “Blurred Lines” that has many saying it perpetuates date rape and the objectifying of women. I hadn’t paid much attention to the guy until the controversy erupted – all I knew was that his dad was an actor in some 80s sitcom. I finally decided to check out his video on Youtube after reading an article with his response to all of the hoopla. In the article Thicke says, "For me it's about blurring the lines between men and women and how much we're the same.", alluding that somehow his song and video support the sexual liberation of women. Basically, to call out the contradiction that women often feel between a society’s demand that they be a “good girl” and their own need of fulfilling their sexual desires, that women have the right to be as sexual as men. But then he admits to degrading women in the video as a way of making light of it, "People say, 'Hey, do you think this is degrading to women?' I'm like, 'Of course it is. What a pleasure it is to degrade a woman. I've never gotten to do that before. I've always respected women.' So we just wanted to turn it over on its head and make people go, 'Women and their bodies are beautiful. Men are always gonna want to follow them around.'" Yikes! 

While I’m all for sexual equality and am not offended by nudity, after watching the video I wondered how this guy thought that it in any way was helping the female population. Throughout the video he parades topless women clad only in flesh-colored G-strings with vacant looks on their faces while he, fully dressed, and a couple other dudes, also fully dressed, sing and leer. To add to the insult he shows a woman provocatively playing with a large stuffed dog, another one holding a live lamb (what the???), and then another scene where he pretends to inject a huge hypodermic needle into a woman’s backside (Rohypnol®, anyone?). 

I could go on and on about how wrong (in my opinion) this video is, but that actually isn’t the point of this week’s message so I’ll get off the soapbox now. The point is all of the attention that this guy is getting and the fact that he’s so unaware of what it is that he says he’s trying to support. He’s either stupidly chauvinistic or simply a great marketer…or maybe both. Which finally leads me to this week’s message about finding balance between those things that deserve our attention (creating a more accepting and loving society), and those things that don’t (Robin Thicke and his video). And yes, I know that through this post I'm bringing him more attention, but I think some exposure (pun intended) of his lack of awareness might actually shift a few perspectives on how women deserve to be treated in the media. So let’s call out the misogyny that permeates our culture and have conversations about that so we can begin to create change, and not give Mr. Thicke anymore of our attention…maybe he’ll learn something…

With Love.

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From Over There:

“Focus primarily on that which uplifts society, while bringing awareness to that which degrades as it allows an opening for change to occur. By viewing the issues that degrade members of a society it uncovers behaviors that one may have exhibited without understanding the impact on another. Understanding the impact of a given behavior – those that uplift as well as those that degrade – allows for a shift in perception that creates greater awareness and acceptance. Through this awareness and acceptance one can forge a deeper connection with those actions and thought processes that uplift society. This, in turn, lessens the focus on the offending actions, thus removing power the offender has over the target of the offense. With less power come fewer followers and fewer to imitate the action. With increased focus on that which uplifts come a greater number of those who would follow and imitate the action.”

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Featured Guest: Aretha Franklin

This week’s featured guest is none other than beautiful vocal force, Aretha Franklin. This woman’s musical talent has spanned decades, and she’s gained and maintained respect while in an often male dominated industry without objectifying herself or selling herself short. In honor of this, here is a song of hers that is one of my personal favorites, “Think”.

By the Hammer of Thor

Two of my best friends growing up were of Mexican heritage, and I remember being somewhat jealous of what seemed – in comparison to my bland Nordic ancestry – a rich and vibrant culture. It always felt like I was missing out on something when it came to embracing my own heritage. Not to mention the food. I would not like to live in a world that didn’t include a good mole sauce. And as far as I knew, the only culinary contribution from my people was the sugary breakfast food known as the Danish pastry. I guess you could say that I didn’t feel very connected to my ancestors.

Though as I’ve gotten older I’ve grown to appreciate my Norwegian/ Danish parts, I mean after all, my people were Vikings, and we sure did know how to party. The more I know about my heritage, the more I appreciate and have a sense of pride in what my ancestors have contributed to the world. Each and every culture can look into their past – pushing aside the dysfunction – and find gems worth feeling good about. 

This leads to this week’s message about striking balancing between honoring our heritage and not getting caught up in the stereotypical stories that have the potential to keep us constricted. Embrace where you came from, but keep open to the ever expanding mindset of the global community. In other words, let’s celebrate our diversity by sharing it with one another. And as much as I love the spicy-richness of Mexican food, I can still appreciate a Danish pastry now and then, especially with a nice touch of mole sauce.

With Love.

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From Over There:

“Within each and every one of you is genetic coding that connects you to your ancestors. This coding affects thought patterns beginning at birth and molds the way your culture interacts. This structure has been helpful in the survival of cultures, yet has created a division cross-culturally. It is through the attachment of cultural ideals that disallows growth and evolution toward more unified thought process. It is this pattern that keeps certain cultures closed off and stuck in the mindset of superiority over others. While this occurs, global harmony is not possible.

The values of the ancestors are not always necessary to hold onto for future generations since future generations will not have the same life circumstance or survival experiences as the ancestors. As the systems of survival change, so must the value systems evolve. Through global unification cultures around the planet will create ever expanding tolerance and acceptance of one another. It is not necessary to forgo the celebration of one’s culture in order to gain acceptance, it is in the celebration of one’s culture alongside the cultures of others that creates unification and harmony.”

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Featured Guest: Ancestry.com

 At the risk of being too commercial, if any of you want to play around with genealogy this is the easiest site I’ve played with. Not to mention that they offer a 14-day free trial. To learn more visit ancestry.com.

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