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February 22, 2015

What Others Think of You is None of Your Business

Remember those middle schools days when everyone was so awkward and concerned about what the other kids thought of them? And remember that because of this a lot of kids were really mean? By being cruel to the other kids they instilled fear and it gave them the power - however misplaced - to manipulate the behaviors of those around them and make themselves feel superior. For a short period of time anyway. It took me years to realize how these kids acted this way because of their own insecurities and fear.

As we grow up and move through life we (hopefully) move past this stage of emotional develop and learn how to cooperate with each other in a much more productive and enjoyable way. Unfortunately there are a few now and again who haven't seemed to quite get this lesson. You know them, hyper-sensitive (and I'm not talking in an intuitive way) and easily offended and defensive when things don't go their way. They lash out childishly and often leave you feeling vulnerable, overwhelmed or like you've been "slimed" by their energy outburst.

The message below talks about how this hyper self-focused state keeps you stuck and unable to forge genuine relationships. And let's face it, we all carry a little "middle school" around in us now and then, it's just being consciously aware of what it is and how it skews your view that will help move through it with adult wisdom.

With Love.

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From Over There: 2.22.15 Weekly Focus
When one is consumed with the thoughts and opinions of others it creates in them a disconnect from their true self and their higher connection to Universal life force. This acute self-focus is ego driven and keeps the individual in a stunted emotional state. From this emotional state one's interactions with others come from manipulative behavior. It is with this manipulation that the ego attempts to receive what it wants from others without true concern for their needs, even when presented in a benevolent manor. This leaves the individual lacking in authentic relationship interactions, and in a state of perpetual fear of how they are perceived by others.

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Q: Can you explain how releasing intense focus on ourselves helps us?

A: When one shifts from a state of acute self-focus and recognizes that they are truly connected to all and of the Universal life force, then they begin to understand the impact of their actions and move from manipulative behaviors to more compassionate interactions. They release the attachment to the opinions that others may have of them, and therefore, do not make assumptions regarding the opinions from a perspective of fear. This leads to greater overall happiness and deeper personal relationships for the individual.


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